Member Lynn Sayler's Mother
June 6, 1929-Dec. 8, 2012
Retta will be missed by her sons Ron, Brian and Tim; and her daughter,
Lynn Sayler (Alan) and grandchildren Chap, Brad and Christine Sayler.
Unfortunately she suffered physically, financially, mentally and
emotionally under the court system as she was separated from her church,
her friends, and her doctors; and family visitation was severely
restricted when she was moved over 20 miles from her home.
Fortunately she is now free from this abusive system and has joined her
beloved husband, Art, in the presence of her Lord. A memorial service
will be held at her church, Lutheran Church of the Cross (LCC) on Shore
Acres, Saturday Dec. 29 at 3 pm.
In lieu of flowers, please send donation to NASGA (National Association
to Stop Guardianship Abuse), PO
Box 886, Mt. Prospect, IL 60056;
Member Richard Marsh's Mother
1916 - 2008
Clara Marsh - a loving mother and extraordinary woman. Mom was a
victim of Alzheimer's but also a victim of a wrongful guardianship that
turned the last twenty months of her life into her worst nightmare.
May Clara Marsh rest in peace. May those who abused Clara's
person, estate and legacy have cause to reflect upon what they did.
Member Jorge Anderson's Mother
Dec 17, 1922 - Jan 27, 2012
For me, there was only one Mother who was my rock - or as I lovingly
called her the Battleship as a teen to keep her from knowing I was
speaking of her in my conversations to my friends . She grew to love her
nick name; and I grew to revere my best friend for the wisdom she
imparted to me, the love she showered me with all of my life and was
always swift to my call for assistance. A stern friend and Benevolent
mother and my personal crown jewel who helped me to keep the faith many
nights of burning the midnight oils studying.
Thank you Mom for being the guiding force you have been for me. I love
you and I know you're in heaven now, away from a long load of pain and
suffering. You have earned your rest in the arms of our Lord, Jesus
Member Diane Wilson's Mother
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Eulogy by Jim Fargaino
Illinois Legislative Liaison Janet Bedin's Mother
As the sun started to peek over the horizon at 5:12
a.m. Tuesday, Aug. 23rd at 5:12 am God in HIS mercy looked down and took
one of his beloved children home. She took her last breath on this earth
ending one year of human suffering. Her spirit kept the lesson and
tradition of her life, and continued to press on winning over adversity,
fighting unacceptable odds and faithful to the knowledge that "Love
Conquers All." Her generous loving heart continued to beat until 5:25
a.m. as the last goodbye to her children.
Dolores honored the encyclical words of His Holiness Pope John Paul II,
whom she met on a number of occasions at the Vatican, "Be Not Afraid."
This has to be an inspiring lesson that remains for us all. We have all
asked the question, would Dolores' destiny be different if she had not
been compromised by the unjust mistake of not being informed of her CT
Scan results showing a malignant mass taken five months earlier at a
leading Chicago hospital. Dolores' bad experience underlines a
dysfunctional issue in our society in being provoked to fight the social
ills that plague the elderly and the family members who care for their
aging parents. The last year of her existence, she was obliged to fight
two battles at the same time, not only her cancer, but the dysfunctional
medical system that did not allow her any questioning about the crucial
mistake. For that, she was put at risk to be taken away from the loving
care and dedication of her daughter.
Sincere thanks to the National Association of Guardian Abuse (NASGA) who
gave national focus to her story. Her sacrifice has championed a cause
for elder health reform, probate law and guardian abuse reform. Dolores
was very grateful to Tina Stein of WIFR-23 who interviewed her about her
painful experience. With dignity and class, Dolores spontaneously
recited all 44 U.S. presidents as a testament to her memory and
intellect. She did not back down and has become a symbol for elder
patient discharge rights and a right to question why test results
determining she was terminally ill were not given to her. Special thanks
to the support of Sen. John Kerry, as well as Sen. Paul Kirk and Sen.
Dolores was born Oct. 24, 1924, in Rockford to Minnie and Frank De
Grandis at 1223 1/2 Preston St., in the close-knit Italian community of
south Rockford. It was here in the Venetian enclave of south Rockford,
settled by her grandfather, Alessandro DeGrandis, in 1903, that her
personality was formed. Inspired with the values the immigrants from the
Veneto region brought to Rockford of hard work, pride in excellence,
integrity, dignity, doing right and being helpful to others, genuine
values and ethics were taught to Dolores. She attended St. Mary Catholic
School and Ellis School. Graduated from West High School in 1942. At 17
years old, Dolores was introduced into the field of medicine at Rockford
College, where she worked as a medical researcher for Dr. Crawford. At
the outbreak of World War II, Dolores thought her service to community
and country could best be used manning the switchboards. She became a
telephone operator at Illinois Bell, where she patched calls through for
President Roosevelt and President Truman.
On Jan. 15, 1948, Dolores married her first and only love, Emeric Bedin,
at St. Anthony Church. Emeric also originated from the Veneto region of
Italy and was raised in south Rockford. He was willing to lay down his
life for his country, landing in Normandy during WWII. Dolores was a
devoted wife, homemaker and loving mother, who transmitted to her
children art, history and her love of books. She was devoted to taking
care of her only son who has been ill since childhood. This was no doubt
her mission, and an example of her character and life commitment to her
family. When doctors said it would be overwhelming to take care of her
son at home, she proudly replied, "We are Italian; we take care of our
own." That passion and dedication in her heart was how Dolores lived her
Dolores and Emeric celebrated their 50th wedding
anniversary, and unfortunately, shortly thereafter, he died after a long
courageous battle with lung cancer on April 22, 1998. She was devoted to
him and was faithful to his memory, knowing they would be reunited. In
the Holy Jubilee Year 2000, Dolores traveled to Rome to walk through the
Holy Door, where she had an audience with Pope John Paul II, carrying
her husband's picture to be blessed. Dolores traveled to the Holy Land,
following in Christ's footsteps on "Via Dolorosa," the path where He
carried the cross. Dolores' last minutes were serene and peaceful, with
her children embracing her up to the moment her heart stopped. It was in
that moment, the Lord's light made way for her husband, Emeric, to reach
down and greet his bride, escorting her up the stairway to Heaven.
Dolores' legacy lives in the words of St. Paul: "for I am already on the
paint of being sacrificed; the time of my departure has come. I have
fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.
Henceforth, there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which
the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day and not only
to me, but also to all who have loved his appearing. Dolores, gathering
along the way her spiritual values, simplicity, cheerfulness, loyalty
and peace, went to her new life. After a long year of suffering, she
returned to light and happiness up to the Throne of God.
Bertha Longstreet Jackson
Legislative Liaison Brenda Kelley-Nelum's Mother
Peacefully entered rest on Sunday, June 20, 2010. She is
survived by her daughter, Brenda Kelley Nelum and her son-in-law,
Adolphus L. Nelum, both of Woodbridge, Virginia. She is also
survived by a host of other relatives and friends. Visitation
Tuesday, June 29, 2010 at the Saint Frances De Sales Catholic
Church, 2021 Rhode Island Avenue, Washington, DC, 20018 from 10 a.m.
until Mass of Christian Burial at 11 a.m. Interment Fort Lincoln
Cemetery. Arrangements by McGuire Funeral Home.
My mother was a victim of Alzheimer's and she was also a victim of
the conservator system in Washington, DC.
Delores L. Hanhauser
Kim Hanhauser's Mother
HANHAUSER, DOLORES L. - of
Port St. Lucie, FL, formerly of Margate and Ventnor passed away
peacefully in her Daughter's arms on August 1, 2009.
She was born and raised in Upper Darby, PA and moved to the Shore
permanently in 1954. Dolores, along with her husband worked for the
Margate Towers upon its opening for many years. Later she was employed
by the NJ Dept. of Labor and Industry (Unemployment Division) as a
claims examiner for many years. There she made many friends and
thoroughly enjoyed their shopping sprees on Atlantic Avenue during their
lunch breaks. Dolores devoted her life to her Children and Grandchildren
doing very little for herself. She spent her days wondering what she
could do to help them in any way. She spent many years contemplating
moving to Florida however she decided she could not leave her family.
Dolores suffered from a lengthy illness but got her dream in June 2007
when she finally got her wish to move. She enjoyed numerous sightseeing
day trips as well as some overnight visits with family. She enjoyed
being outside in the beautiful sunshine. Her face "lit up" when her Son,
Michael and her Grandchildren came for visits. She loved going to see
her Physicians in Florida as they fell in love with her beautiful smile
and treated her like "royalty".
She will be greatly missed and forever cherished by her family.
Dolores is predeceased in death by her Husband, Alfred M. Hanhauser, her
youngest Son, Stephen J. Nolan and her Sister and Brother-in-Law, Adele
and Robert Christian. She is survived by her two Sons, Michael and James
Nolan, Daughter Kim Hanhauser, StepDaughter Penni Macpherson,
Grandchildren Stephen, Matthew and Christian May, Heather and Peter
Macpherson and Kelly Nolan. She is also survived by two Brothers, Frank
and Jim Larkins of Ocean City and many nieces and nephews.
Memorial Mass will be held at 10:00am on Saturday, September 12, 2009 at
Blessed Sacrament Church, Margate. In lieu of flowers, please make any
donations to NASGA (National Association to Stop Guardianship Abuse) an
organization working to protect our elderly, at PO Box 886, Mt.
Prospect, IL 60056.
John T "Jack" Donovan
and former Vice President Sherry Moser's Father
Donovan of Daly City, California passed away peacefully in his
daughter's home in Las Vegas, May 3rd 2009.
He was the
former Director of Enforcement of the Bay Area Air Quality Management
Board. Previous to that job he was the Auditor in Charge of the history
making California "outpost" in Chicago.
Dad had a
special twinkle in his eye, and an infectious smile that endeared him to
everyone that he met. He was an extraordinary man that was always there
for his family and friends.
He was often
the first person that people would turn to when they needed some sound
advice or just a caring ear to listen.
the unobstructed Pacific Ocean view from his beloved Daly City home of
over 40 years. Some of his best times were spent reclining in his easy
chair, drinking a cup of hot cocoa, while listening to Johnny Mathis and
watching the hang gliders soar over the cliffs and ocean directly behind
He also loved
travelling. Thankfully, dad was able to travel with his daughter, son in
law, and grandchildren to New York, Tahoe and numerous trips to their
cabin in Utah up until just a few months ago.
Sadly, in his
final years, dad became a victim of the once well intentioned, but now
misguided guardianship system.
Due to a
family squabble, the San Mateo Public Guardian became involved in Dad's
life as his temporary guardian. As a result, dad was forced to pay
$15,000 per month for care. He would not be able to stay in his home
very long at those exorbitant costs. The next step would be the selling
of his home, and forcement into a nursing home against his will.
squabble was quickly resolved with all family members agreeing that his
daughter should be his guardian, the Public Guardian's Office stubbornly
refused to let go. When asked by dad's longtime neighbor why they would
not release their control of him as there was no longer any need for
their involvement, she was informed that they had too much time and
money involved in his case to just let him go.
As a result,
dad's beloved home overlooking the ocean was sold against his wishes and
his belongings were disposed of.
Dad will be
so sadly missed. But he will be lovingly remembered.
information, please contact his daughter at
Finley Eversole's Mother
November 6, 1910 - April 25, 2009
Frieda Eversole, born November 6, 1910, passed away on Saturday,
April 25, 2009 at the age of 98-and-a-half. One of six children,
mother was also a fourth cousin to Abraham Lincoln, of which she was
justly proud. She spent the first fourteen years of her life on a
farm in southern Alabama, and then moved to Birmingham, AL,
eventually attended and graduated from college during the Great
Depression. She married my father, Finley Pratt Eversole, a year
later. I was born a year-and-a-half into their marriage and am
their only child.
life, mother was an astonishingly hard worker, compassionate and
generous to all around her, always thinking of others first. After
World War II she spent at least a year gathering clothing and
bedding and shipping it to victims in war torn countries in Europe.
She loved to entertain and was an exceptional cook. She had an
infectious smile to the very end. Only after my father’s passing in
May 1999 did I discover her quick wit and amazing sense of humor.
Just one example: a couple months before her death, as I often did,
I said to her, “I love you.” A few seconds later I asked, “Do you
love me?” Her reply: “Yes. Aren’t you lucky!” Sometimes she
would simply smile and say, “I love me too.”
My parents and I
were close despite spending many years of our adult lives spent far
Taking care of my
mother the final eleven years of her life has been the greatest
privilege of my life. The love she shared taught me more about love
than I could have imagined possible. Letting her go is difficult on
some levels, but we are spiritual beings in physical bodies, and her
body had been too confining for her bright soul for some time. Now
she is free. I believe the bonds of love are never broken and that
the life and love we shared for this all-too-brief time will
continue on. As I had hoped, I got to be alone with her in her
final hours, holding her and talking to her, telling her what a good
mother she had been and that our love would continue on. Part of
loving is letting those we love move on when the soul decides its
earthly work for this lifetime is done. I was blessed with
J.P. (Speck) Manire
Member Kim Manire's Father in Law
"We lost Speck (JP) Sunday morning at 9:16. His
breathing got more and more shallow, and his breaths farther and farther
apart. He only had morphine 4 times since they admitted him, a week ago
last Wed. He passed with no pain, although you could tell that he was
have a hard time breathing. I hate that we have only gotten to see him 6
times in the last 4 years, but this last week and a half we got to spend
night and day with him.
For this I am thankful."
October 26, 1964 - February 20, 2008
He passed away on February 20,
2008 at the young age of 43. He leaves behind his loving mother of Tucson, his beloved 15 year old son of Atlanta, and his precious 12 year old daughter of Atlanta as well as many other loving friends and
family. He is preceded in death by his father
and his son. He was born in El Reno,
Oklahoma where his proud parents took him to Puerto Rico for the first 2
years of his life. The family then relocated to the Tucson area where
he grew up and developed his love of the outdoors and his mother's
love of dogs. He moved to California as a young adult and married. They were blessed with three beautiful children.
He spent many years riding horses with his family.
He would recall the family trail rides as a time where the best talking
occurred. He considered fatherhood to be his greatest achievement.
His son remembers him as a Dad who would give someone the shirt
off his back or cover the fare for a stranger on the bus who was down on
his luck. His daughter remembers her Daddy as a faithful
confidante and a masterful storyteller who enjoyed entertaining her.
He will never be forgotten and will live on forever in the beautiful
eyes of his children and the warm heart of his mother.
Dee King's Dad
November 30, 1919 – November 6, 2008
Lifelong NY resident, WWII vet, teacher,
On a visit to daughter in Ct. (2005) became embroiled in the Ct. Probate
System where the judge, denied him his constitutional rights, although
he begged for them.
The judge went on to give Dan to a conservator who had him locked up in
a nursing home, even though it was not the highest level for him, had
him forced medications, refused him his own doctors, his own choice of
lawyers, prevented him from seeking aid of any advocacy groups, denied
his right to visitors, family, stripped him of all assets, put his house
up for sale - all his worldly possessions disappeared.
In 2006, due to the efforts of some incredible high-minded people, they
fought for, and won the freedom of this 86 year old man.
In 2007, the legislators changed the law to protect the rights of others
Those we have the utmost gratitude for are Atty. Veronica Halpern (Htfd.
Legal Aid), Rick Green of the Hartford Courant, Atty.John Peters, who
worked pro-bono to free Dan, Atty. Marilyn Denney (Htfd. Legal Aid),
Eric Zager of Fox 61 News, Royal Stark of Quinnipiac Law School and the
students who helped, Tom Berrant of CTLegal Project and others, Dan's
friends, and finally the outstanding judge of Superior Court, Judge
Gormley, who restored justice and freedom to Dan Gross.
We thank God above all and for putting these wonderful people in our
path to overcome this perverse system that preys on the vulnerable.
Dan said this was always about the money--he was right.
He also said, "Never give up"-- we won't!
May 11, 1912- Oct 28, 2006
Member Oksana Hordijuk’s Mother
My Grandparents often traveled from the Ukraine to the United States ,
and on one visit, my Mother, Stephanie, was born in NYC.
When the war started, my Mother
was living in Bratislava , Czechoslovakia . The Red Army was coming and
was roughly 90 miles away. My parents packed a suitcase and escaped,
taking the last cattle car before the bombs fell. (My father was in
the Ukrainian army and held a high position in the Ministry and the
family would have been sent to Siberia .)
That was the first time my
Mother lost all her treasured things. It took one year to travel to
Bremenhaven , Germany to get a boat that my Grandfather had arranged for
the family to go to the US where my Mother was a US citizen. We had
very little to eat and looked like we had come from a camp.
My parents started again in a
walk up apartment. My Mom was going to night school and working in a
sweat shop making flowers for hats. My father, an engineer, washed
dishes until he could get an engineering job.
My Mother was very good with
hats and finally worked for Miss Mary. At that time, women wore hats
and Miss Mary’s hats ended up in Bergdorf Goodman’s in NYC and many fine
stores. One of Miss Mary’s clients was Jackie Kennedy.
My Mother had a hard life, she
worked hard for her money and saved what she could. When she got older,
my ex-brother wanted her in assisted living in FL and wanted to sell her
house. He drugged her and took her to FL without my knowledge. With a
“separate agent power of attorney”, he transferred all of Mother’s money
under his and Mother’s name.
I snuck my Mother out of FL and
back to her home. He told me if I wanted the money for Mother, I’d have to take
him to court. "I am Mother's financial advisor", he said, so I had
to apply for guardianship to get at Mother's funds for her to live on
and also pay her bills.
Mother was afraid he’d
take her again.
Instead of appointing me as
Mother's guardian, the court s
put a guardian third party guardian (a stranger) in place.
But my big question is, who
guards the guardian? So far, I can’t find the answer. The guardian was
not a protector but instead was a predator.
July 17, 1921 – October 13, 2006
Member Mary Claire Connors' Mother
Grace Connors graduated from
West Pittston High School and was a member of Immaculate Conception
Church, West Pittston, PA.
She was beautiful inside and
out, devoted to her family and lived an active life, supporting
political campaigns, pursuing a strong appreciation for the arts and
attending to her civic duties. She was a coordinator for the Red Cross
during the flood of 1972. She was an officer of the retired National
Association of Federal Employees Union, Pittston Chapter.
Tragically, Mom suffered
horribly and needlessly the last five years of her life under unlawful
public guardianship through the County Orphans Court, which was in
appeal when she died.
For over 2 ½ years, I was not
allowed to visit her at the nursing facility holding her captive. During
this time, Mom, suffering from dementia, thought I deserted her and
didn’t love her anymore. (Under my one on one care with unlimited
medical/health resources, her dementia had improved and further
improvement was expected until the unlawful guardianship claimed
dominion over her completely thereby enforcing a slow but steady
decline.) By the time these brief and regulated visits were allowed, my
Mom had deteriorated so much, I didn’t recognize her.
Because her family was her first
priority, the court’s ordered isolation with only limited contact with
her granddaughter and only in the office of the corporate nursing
facility under supervision, was so very punitive to her.
The closer we got to appeal
date, the quicker she declined as the alleged guardian, kept relating
that Mom was dying for several months. In spite of being told,
allegedly by the so called guardian, that "your daughter is selling your
house out from under you" (totally false), Mom only believed her for a
day or so and then be right back to talking positively about me. Near
the end, when the alleged public guardian agency was becoming fearful
of a wrongful death suit, I was offered the guardianship.
Mom was a strong and determined
woman but she couldn’t hold out long enough to regain her freedom and
rights --- both unlawfully stolen from her. She held on as long as she
could but in the end, her only release --- her freedom was gained by her
death. She was dehydrated and starved to death after all of her teeth
were removed; she died skin and bones after we were forbidden to give
her water when she asked for it.
She was my best friend. She
was a loving wife and mother, a kind person, and followed the law and
advice from AARP, attorneys, etc. by making a Durable Power of Atty. and
designating me as her atty.-in-fact, which she never revoked. She had
Long Term Care Insurance, etc. My father was a WWII veteran; they paid
all their taxes and lived honest good lives instilling the same values
in their children.
The court used no evidence --
only hearsay, to destroy and punish her with the orders that
benefited only corporate interests, and some "good ole boys and girls"
at the expense of her, her legacy, her family and the
I am compelled to speak, write
and inform citizens of this atrocity in the hope that enough exposure of
such heinous predatory hidden practices can be stopped by public outcry
and action. I will be forever affected by the long term trauma & loss
that was unimaginable as an American citizen.
In addition to her husband,
James G. Connors, who died in 1986, she was preceded in death by her
daughter, Patricia Connors, who also died in 1986. She is survived by
her daughter, Mary Claire, and granddaughter, Keely, who miss her more
every day until they meet again in spirit.
It is part of Mom's legacy to
have her and our suffering and losses count for something.
(c) 2006 NASGA
Guardianship abuse and conservatorship